Man Shares Article Claiming That All Of His Bad Habits Are Typical Traits Of An Intelligent Person

Published on Thursday, 5 March 2015

Mark Dale, a 23 year-old male from Derby, shared an article on his Facebook timeline yesterday which heavily implied that certain psychologically destructive and anti-social traits of his were proof of intellectual superiority.

The article headlined "Research shows that intelligent people stay up late asphyxi-wanking to hentai porn whilst off their tits on meth", was shared by Mark in an apparent attempt to validate his pitiful existence.

The article claimed that "When we think of an intelligent person, we are conditioned to think that their behavior would be boring and wholesome – like sitting in a library studying. Whereas, what the data shows is that they are actually more likely to be off their tits on some form of Class A drug and performing any number of depraved sex acts whilst listening to some form of incongruous background music."

However, the researchers were keen to highlight the fact that "correlation does not mean cause" and that people shouldn't get the idea that staying up late, doing meth and asphyxi-wanking will necessarily make them more intelligent.


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