Londoners Rejoice At Prospect Of Legalised Fox Hunting

Published on Tuesday, 9 May 2017
City dwellers may look forward to peaceful summer nights as Theresa May announced plans for a vote to reintroduce fox hunting in inner cities. If the vote is successful it will allow anyone with a red jacket and couple of bricks to kill a fox making a racket at night.
 
The New Age Man questioned Theresa May on her announcement, she said:
 
“I’m not announcing this to try and get blind votes in the upcoming election, you know. I’ve convinced myself it’s something everyone probably wants and needs. 
 
“It’s absolute chaos on Downing Street at night. Every fucking night at 4 am, right when I’m practicing saying “strong and stable” without getting tongue tied, all I can hear are foxes shagging and I mean really going at it.”
 
Fox hunting, considered a blood sport by some, was made illegal in 2004. Many argued the controversial ban didn’t take into consideration people in cities, who were among the worst affected. 
 
Although the ban was introduced, it is believed that tens of thousands of people still take part in illegal fox hunts across the country. Mark Webber, a man who may, or may not take part in fox hunts spoke to the New Age Man:
 
“Until fox hunting is legalised we are just going to have to carry on fox hunting.”
 
 
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