10 Animals That Look Like Penises

Published on Thursday, 5 September 2013

Everyone loves a good knob joke, and judging by these animals, so does God. Here are a few of God’s creations that look like penises.

1. Gaebul
The Gaebul, which has the alternative name of "the Penis" fish, is eaten in parts of Korea, Japan and, on occasion, in the toilets of O’Neils on a Friday night.
2. Acorn Worm
Just like a real penis, the Acorn Worm is an invertebrate. It uses its head to dig, search for food and think.
3. Geoduck
The Geoduck is actually a species of large underwater clam, which makes the Geoduck a penis-vagina.
4. Earthworm Jim
Unfortunately for Earthworm Jim, his entire body looks like a very thin penis. However, luckily for him, he has a super suit, a gun and is awesome.
5. Penis Snake
AKA the floppy snake, is actually a very rare limbless amphibian. It’s probably rare because approaching a member of the opposite sex when your entire body looks like a huge knob is not an easy thing to do; even if your species doesn't have eyes.
6. Titanoboa
The largest snake ever discovered, at 15 meters in length, closely resembles the penis of the pub bragger.
7. Sea Lamprey
Unlike a penis, the Sea Lamprey has rows of teeth and two eyes.
8. Sea Cucumber
Interestingly, the sea cucumber’s elongated body contains one single branched gonad. Which means this penis contains balls. Or rather ball.
9. Penis Worm
Wikipedia is one of the few places that call the penis worm by its official name; Priapulida. Its ribbed body is for the mud\'s pleasure, where it burrows and lives.
10. Jeremy Kyle
The biggest penis of them all.

If you want to see more stuff like this, like our Facebook page and we will beam it straight to your News Feed. Or don't, whatever.